He Nose no Bounds
by Noone the Virgin
Summary: Attraction, obsession, manipulation, all key ingredients to an unhealthy relationship.
1. Chapter 1

It was strange, seeing this man. He looked like me, but wasn't really like me. I was amazed by his overall way of thinking and his fearlessness of leaping from high areas. He seemed to be interested in me as I was in him. We talked a little and then went back to the Galley-La. He took me to his own room, which was fairly bland. But even then, it accentuated his overall charisma. We talked for a while before getting to the subject of dating. "So, Usopp." He asked me. "How are you in the dating game?" "Well, I'm the best there is!" I lied. "The women call me Love Master Usopp!" I laughed at my own shame, only for Kaku to see through it all. "I'm not good at women, either." He said, smiling. I stopped laughing. "You saw through my act." "Yep." He stood up. "I honestly don't care for most women in this day and age. I'm fond of most of my friends and comrades, most of them who are male." "Most of my comrades are male, too!" "Are you engaged in relationships with them?" Kaku suddenly asked me. "We have a strong bond with one another. Me and Luffy are like brothers!" I told him. "Me and Paulie are like brothers, too. You ever noticed how he's flustered with most women?" "Yeah..." "Well, there's a reason for that..."

"GAY?!" I yelled. "Paulie's gay?!" "Surprised, are we? He isn't the only one." Kaku replied. "It's the Pigeon Guy, right? That Hair Man?" "You're warm..." I took a minute to think and suddenly the truth hit me. "..." "You figured it out, sonny." He told me. "Why are you telling me this?" I asked. "There's a shortage of...men around these parts." I caught his pass. "Me? You want me?" "You catch on quickly." Kaku said, chuckling. "I'm not even gay. I like women. And that's not a lie." "That it isn't." Kaku sighed. "Oh well. If I can't get them normally, I'll have to get them the hard way..." Kaku pulled out a sword. "Take off your pants, Usopp!" My hair jumped up. "Wha-what?" "Take off your pants! Show me Usopp Jr.!" "I-I-I don't wanna!" I told him, shaking faster than a crackhead in cold weather. But Kaku went and slashed off my pants straps. My overalls fell down, showing my Strawhat boxers (Patent pending)."Take those off, too." He said sternly. I couldn't even move. "Do it or I'll kill you!" I took them off immediately. Usopp Jr's hair stood up too.

Kaku put his sword away and went to my face, looking at me passionately. "Your nose is so cute." He said, rubbing it. "What do you think of my nose?" I managed a few words. "It's...square." Kaku chuckled lightly. "Well, I can't say it isn't." He began to lick my face and scrawny body. I was amazed that he actually wanted me of all people. Zoro has a trained body from all of his workouts, Sanji has an ottermode going on with his smoking and Luffy can do a lot with his rubber body. Me? I don't have much going on. I'm weak, scrawny and just plain stringy. I couldn't fill up a lion. Kaku went below the belt. "Hey, what are you doing?" I asked. "Making you relax, that is." Kaku went for Usopp Jr., tugging onto him. I couldn't get hard. I had to stay soft. I thought of homo thoughts. Luffy, naked. Zoro and Sanji doing something with their shirts off. Nami reading something with a tight shirt, her bosom busting out- Usopp Jr. sprung up against my will. "Ah! He's finally ready to go!" Kaku said, ready to suck him. "No! Not that!" I yelled. He went and put his mouth on Jr.. His mouth was tender and warm, soft and moving. I was paralyzed from this sensation. "Why does this feel so...amazing?" I thought. "I can't believe this is all from a man." I closed my eyes and thought of Kaya. But I couldn't do it. I couldn't do that to her. I looked at Kaku, sweating. He was going faster and faster. I couldn't hold it in anymore.

I was at his mercy, I couldn't help myself, I yelled, "Usooooooopp BLAST!" Jr. spat out his innards, all over and inside Kaku. He smiled. "You taste pure, my little Usopp." He said, chuckling. "Usopp Jr. didn't do that because he liked it. He did it due to his sudden case of the I-Got-Excited-Over-The-Warm-Feeling-Of-Your-Mouth Disease!" Kaku went to my face, rubbing our noses together. "You are mine now." He said. "Come back here tomorrow, same time and same clothes." "What if I don't?" "Usopp Jr. will be in that empty jar. I practically fainted. I got the fuck outta there and went back to Merry. No one could know what happened just now. I showered off and went to sleep. I wonder, while he was sucking me off, I liked the feeling so much I couldn't bear to think about anyone else but him. Is this...love?"


	2. Returning the Favor

I began to dream...I was in a void of clouds and water. It was as if I was standing on an unseeable barrier separating me from the outside. I heard a voice echo in my head. "Thank you..." It said. "Thank you..." "Huh? Who are you?" I yelled. "I am...a close friend. I've been by your side for a while now." I looked around, hoping to find the source. Finally, a bright light shined in front of me. "Thank you for taking care of me, Usopp." It said. "I shall reveal myself to you now..." With a bright flash, appeared a little girl, pale and floating about. "Who are you?" I asked. "I've never seen you before." "I am the one who has taken you afar the sea. I am the one who took you to the skies and beyond." "Merry? Really?" "I am actually the spirit within Merry. I've watched over it since you departed from your home so long ago." "Really? So, you've seen everything we've done?" I asked. "Yes. To your countless battles with pirates, to the quiet days of you and our captain fishing for Sea King, and..." The spirit began to blush. "I've seen you touch yourself to your crewmates as well..." I jumped up. "Hey! It gets lonely and boring at times!" I said to her. "It's not like anyone would want me, a cowardly weakling..." "Not true." The spirit said. "That shipwright seems to like you a lot." "Eh, you know about that?" She knew about Kaku and me. Just great. "Yes. And, there's someone else who likes you a lot, too..."

The spirit came to mfw she said that. She gave me a light kiss on my right cheek. "Usopp, even though you aren't a shipwright, or a brave warrior, you still gave me a lot of good laughs and feelings. Thank you." She smiled a big smile at me. I couldn't help but boast. "Well, I try my best to please!" "I want you to follow your heart and do what's right." The spirit said to me. "Huh?" "Allow me to give you that which your crewmates would not." "Sure. What do you have?" I asked. "Allow me to take your greatest shame from you: Your virginity. At this point, I had not expected her to say such a thing. I won't lie, Usopp Jr. tingled a little. "But, you're a...You're too young!" I told her. "I have been within this ship and the wood that made it for over a hundred years." She said. "Age is only a small barricade between love." She went to me face up again. "Do you love me, Brave Warrior of the Sea?" "I do, Merry." I said, tearing up. "We all do." "Then show me. I want to experience how humans have sex with the ones that they love..." I couldn't help but cry. Merry loved me this much to the point of wanting to be with me intimately.

While Usopp banged a ghost loli, In another part of Merry, Zoro was pounding Sanji's smooth ass. "Again, you can't beat me, Lovecook!" He said. "Dammit, I don't want you, I want Nami! And Robin..." Sanji started to sob. "Shut up! You wanna wake up everyone?" "You know what, yeah, I do. HEY EVERY-" Sanji was cut off by Sandai Kitetsu, whom was brandished by Zoro. "Sandai wants you to keep quiet, he says." Zoro told the repressed lovecook. "I agree. Wanna see a pastry this time?" Sanji made a face. "A WHAT!" "Yep, sounds good to me." Zoro began to pound on Sanji's asshole with his dick. Sanji, in spite of his objection, began to moan. "You're so cute when you moan, Swirly." Zoro said, snickering. "Fuck you-ooh, man." They kept it up for about ten minutes before Zoro finally spurted all over inside of Sanji's rectum. "Game set." Zoro said, getting up. "This isn't over, Marimo!" Sanji said, crying. "You're right, you didn't even climax with me. Better finish up." Zoro walked away, yawning. Sanji did just that, pissed off.

Back in my dream, Merry's spirit was moaning, having her hole destroyed by Usopp Jr. "This is it, Merry." I said to her. "I'm coming!" "Do it, Usopp." She said. "Don't hold back!" "Usopp BURST!" I came so much, I couldn't believe it. My first time(consensually)was with the spirit of the ship that I cared for. It was strange, but I loved every moment of it. "Thank you, Usopp." She said. "You're welcome, Merry." I replied. "I...love you, Merry. Always." "Thank you...thank you..." Her voice faded away."Usopp...Usopp..." I woke up. "It was a dream? Merry wasn't really..." A voice called my name. "Usopp." It was Kaku. "Ah!, It's you!" I yelled. "You bastard, what do you want?" "I told you I wanted to see you tomorrow, right?" He said. "Well, it's tomorrow now. I couldn't help myself. I had to see you, my little Usopp~"


	3. He Nose What's Best for Me

Kaku was laying on me, stroking my nose. "I couldn't wait any longer, sonny." He said. "I had to see you as soon as I possibly could." He smiled. I was scared for my life. "Now there, why is your nose so limp and dull?" He told me. "We need to look after each other, wouldn't you agree fellow long nose? He began to lick my nose and suck on the tip. Then he went down and up, as if he were sucking on Jr.. I got scared. "Stop, don't do that!" I told him. "Oh, are you weak here as well? If I were to do something to it, would you have an 'accident'?" "It's not that, it's just that…" He stopped. "Wait, my nose needs a polish, too. He turned around and faced me upside down. "Now, I'll do you and you do me, my dear boy." Kaku began to suck on my nose and I had no choice but to do so to him as well. His nose was square and long like mine. It was strange. He started to dig in my pants, looking for Jr.. I really had no choice. Maybe I could make him tingle if I sucked his nose hard enough. "Easy there, buck." Kaku told me. "I'm not as prone as you are. He sucked my nose hard. And somehow, I began to leak. "Ah, you've gotten sweaty!" He pulled out his hand, with my precum on his fingers.

"Hey, that wasn't from the nosejob, it was from-" Kaku put his fingers in his mouth. "And don't put that in your mouth!" "What, you want to leave a mess?" Kaku smiled with his tongue between his fingers. "Your bashfulness only makes it tastier. Now, let's get started." Kaku pulled down my pants and Usopp Jr. sprung out, precum flying all over. He poked him with his nose. "Get ready, my dear boy." Kaku began to suck Jr. swiftly. "No, not that!" I was under his spell. I didn't want to do this. I wanted a woman to do this to me. Not a clone of myself. Or could he be my brother…DAMMIT DAD, YOU SPENT TIME WITH HIM AND NOT ME! I began to cry. "Oh no, why is my dear boy crying?" Kaku asked me. "My dad spent time with you and not me!" I blubbered. "Father? My father was a…" Kaku stopped. "…wasn't around. Yours wasn't either?" I sniffled a little. "No. He went to become a pirate and left me and my mother home." I began to spill everything to this stranger who looked like me, if I were brave and not a black-Jew hybrid coward. "What a sad tale you have, young Usopp." Kaku said, holding me on his chest. You need a little tea and some rest. He went up and went to the kitchen. I couldn't believe I told my whole story to him. Why? What did I see in him? Why did I do it? Was this another part of my weakness I dared not to confront? So much is happening to me. Kaku came back to me. "It looks like you're fresh out of anything on this ship, it seems." He told me. "Let's run to my place."

I went with him to his place. It was a little bland, and lonely. Like something an older adult would live in. He gave me some tea and talked to me some more. "Your father did what a lot of men do in this vast sea, whether they be pirates or marines, they leave out for an adventure of their own." "But how is that fair to the children?" I asked. "I waited over half my life for his return. Mom died due to worrying so much, and I lied so damn much." "Now, now." Kaku grabbed my hand. "We need to calm you down."

"That's it, Usopp. Faster, faster!"

I was giving him a taste of Junior's wrath. At this point, I didn't care anymore. I had no crew, no ship and really no one else to support me. He was the only one that showed any concern for me. He listened to my tale, he listened to my burden and he decided to consult me, albeit in a strange way. I was happy. I was relieved. I didn't care about anyone else but Kaku. And he didn't care about anyone else but me…

We spent the night having man-sex until finally, we both collapsed, having emptied our burdens and desires into each other. Our noses nuzzled together, still covered with lube. He gave me some medicine for my wounds. "You have more to you than your body shows." He said. I laughed. "Of course! I'm a brave warrior of the sea…" I slowly nodded off.

"Of course you are, my dear boy."

"Of course you are."

I woke up. I was no longer in Kaku's room but in some other room. Outside looked like a terrible mess. I got word from one of the attendants that Aqua Laguna was approaching. I looked everywhere for Kaku, but I couldn't find him. While searching for him, I caught a glimpse of my old comrades. They didn't see me.

The wounds I succumbed to that night are still fresh.


End file.
